Red Wings 4, Maple Leafs 2: Post Game Snipes...

• Hey, look, I'm actually writing a game recap! This one comes to you courtesy of the fact that I have to work in the morning and had to skip a night out with my roomies. And also my rage over the Lupul goal/Howard's injury. It's always nice to put a good rant down on paper (or, you know, the internet) every once in a while.
• The first was one of the best periods I've seen the Wings play in a while. Passes were crisp. Their puck possession was dominant. Even though it ended tied at one, the Wings looked to be in control.
• The second was a little rockier, and the Wings found themselves in penalty trouble toward the end.
• They took a 2-1 lead into the premature intermission thanks to a classic Homer deflection in front of the net. How sad is it that his first reaction to the goal was to look over at the ref to make sure he wasn't going to wave it off?
• Since Dion Phaneuf's shot broke a pane of glass during a Toronto powerplay with a couple of minutes left in the second, the teams took intermission early to avoid a long delay. This kind of played in Toronto's favor since they got clean ice for the second half of their powerplay, but it ended up not mattering. The Wings took another penalty right before the carryover time wound down anyway.
• The real disaster came in the third period when Jimmy Howard went down with an injury. I've got some ranting to do about the ensuing goal, but I'd happily spot the Leafs ten such goals if it meant that Jimmy finished the game healthy. All this talk of the Baby Pegger (who, despite being my favorite goalie prospect for his Training Camp snipe, I have absolutely no desire to see in a Wings uniform right now) possibly being called up has me in full RSV mode.
• Just to be clear, in the NHL, this is not a goal, but this is. Listen, I like to think I'm a pretty smart lady, but I once again find myself confounded by events in an NHL game. I fail to see how a goal can be called back one night because a goalie initiated contact with a skater who was outside of the crease because of “incidental contact,” and then a few nights later, have a goal stand when a player bumped into the goalie in the crease and proceeded to fall on his back, pinning him to the ice. Take the jerseys the players are wearing out of the question. Only in the NHL does this make sense. Or at least we're supposed to think it makes sense. Or something. I'm not sure anyone really gets it.
• Luckily for the Wings (and my sanity), Jiri Hudler put them back in the lead for good with a quick shot off of a rush.  Check out this picture of his celebration at your own risk.
• Justin Abdelkader was all over the ice tonight. He must've had at least thirty brilliant chances. He didn't finish any of them, but it was a nice effort. Plus, he got into a fight after a big hit on Rafalski, which was also nice to see.
• It looks like Rafalski got lucky after the hit, as his knee brace protected him. It looked pretty bad at first though. I would've been pretty happy if that was the scariest moment of the game. Now that the playoffs are approaching, I'm becoming increasingly paranoid.
• Nick Lidstrom broke up a great scoring chance for the Leafs with a brilliant defensive play. You know, just another day at the rink for him. Sorry, boys, he's just better than you. It's not mean; it's just a fact. Please never leave us, Nick.
• On the other end of the defensive spectrum, Brett Lebda played exactly as you would expect Brett Lebda to play.  How's that Stanley Cup experience treating you now?
• Hey Maple Leafs fans: Todd Bertuzzi's empty net goal effectively ended your team's slight playoff hopes. TAWD Bertuzzi. Hahahaha. Snack on that for lunch.

Hero: Joey MacDonald
He's been astoundingly solid in his last few games, and performed admirably after taking over for Jimmy in the third. I still don't like it one bit, but I guess it does offer some glimmer of hope.

Villain: Joffrey Lupul
Bet you saw that coming, eh?

Final Thought:
This injury nonsense is making my annual post-season nervous tics come early this year.

2010-2011 Player Profiles: Tomas Holmstrom...

Hey, kids, guess what? Hockey's almost here. That means it's time for me to get back into this whole blogging thing that I've neglected during the off-season. Since I lack the creativity to come up with a new gimmick, I decided to continue the Player Profiles series I did last year leading up to the season. I'll be taking a look at a different player (almost) every day between now and when hockey starts. By my count, there are 17 days until the Wings open the regular season. Get excited. Today's subject:

Tomas Holmstrom

2009-2010 Regular Season: 68 GP, 25-20-45, +/-5, 60 PIM

2010 Playoffs: 12 GP, 4-3-7, +/- 3, 12 PIM

Season Highlight:  Scoring his 200th goal in classic Homer fashion against New Jersey.  (It always seems like he should have more goals than that after all these years.)

Season Lowlight:  Letting Brett Lebda break his foot in practice.

After struggling with injuries in recent years, Homer had a bit of a resurgence last season. He missed some time due to a broken foot suffered during practice (Thanks, Lebda.), but was one of the Wings' most consistent scorers. He ended up contributing a much higher thane expected 25 goals during the regular season. Despite what the media would have you believe, there's still nobody better at screening opposing goalies and causing havoc in front of the net than #96.

Homer's still an essential part of the powerplay, and he's slated for first line duty with the Eurotwins this season. If he stays healthy, he should once again be racking up tip-ins and “unofficial” assists. There are few things more enjoyable to Wings fans than seeing Homer make life miserable for opposing goalies. Plus, any interview with the man is bound to be entertaining, for sure.

What he needs to do to make me smile: Keep introducing goalies to his backside.

SSDD's Adventures Through History Contest...

One night, whilst the Commune was sitting around a bonfire, we began joking about the possibility of photoshops of Brett Lebda through the ages. Hilarity ensued, and the second ever SSDD contest was set in motion. In light of the Lebster’s departure for Toronto (an event which I am incredibly disappointed that I missed while on vacation), I decided to open it up to include all current and former Red Wings.

The goal is to place said players in the most amusing historical situations you can think of. I made a couple for my own entertainment based on what we discussed around the campfire. The first photoshop shows Lebda parting the waters on his way to Toronto. Or somewhere. Who knows. Below, we have King Bertuzzi snacking on a juicy turkey leg.

The contest will be judged by my mom and dad. First and second place will each receive some Red Wings goodies obtained from this spring's viewing parties. First place will get a reusable grocery bag with a Budd Lynch bobblehead, car flag, and a Red Wings Christmas ornament (my favorite because it's high-quality and doesn't have logos on it). Second place gets a Wings water bottle and a playoff pom pom.

I’m kind of a history buff, so this should be lots of fun. I'll leave the contest open until midnight next Tuesday. With any luck, I'll even get around to judging the contest in a timely manner this time around.

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly Part Two...

The Bad

• There was plenty of bad to go around this season. It was by far the most stressful one in recent memory. We really did get to see how the other half lives.
• After this season, can we all just agree that the shootout needs to go? The Wings were absolutely miserable at it all season long. There’s really no good explanation for this either. They should really be a lot better what with all of their talent. If anyone out there has an idea, let me know. Aside from that, a shootout on the final day of the regular season determined which team got into the playoffs. Not cool.
• The much-hyped trip to Sweden to start the regular season turned out to be a bust. The Wings came home with an 0-2 record and not a lot to show for their travel. Little did we know that the event was going to be a perfect preview of what most of the rest of the season was going to look like.
• Remember how excited we all were to see a whole season of Jonathan Ericsson? Big Rig didn’t quite live up to the promise he showed during the playoffs last season. He seemed to devote this year to turnovers and giving Wings fans heart attacks.
• This shootout goal that won the game for Dallas was an absolute joke. It wasn’t the most ridiculous event of the season, but it was up there. It was just another one of those moments that makes fans hate the NHL. And of course it had to be "scored" by Steve Ott.
  
• Todd Bertuzzi.
• In January, Brett Lebda managed to break Tomas Holmstrom’s foot during practice. Just when we thought the injury plague was going away and some of the guys were coming back, another one went down. That was definitely not RAAAAGHHHH.
• Remember when we thought Nick Lidstrom would never score a goal again?
• The powerplay was pathetic for a long stretch of the season. Like most of the events of this season, this was unusual and difficult for Wings fans to adjust to.
• The Brad May experiment was clearly a failure. He was useless for sticking up for his teammates. Last time I checked, that was his only purpose for being in the NHL. There’s a reason he ended up finishing the season in Grand Rapids.
• Patrick Eaves’ shootout attempt during the H2H weekend was the stuff of legend. It was like his own little gift to our party. It even spawned the #Eavesed hashtag. Since the Wings ended up winning the game, it’s easy to laugh about now. It’s one of those moments the poor guy is never going to live down. Watch and enjoy:
• During a home game, a section of the lower bowl had to be evacuated because a couple of guys had found their way up into the rafters. It was…interesting.
• NHL scheduling during the playoffs once again baffled everyone involved. Was it really necessary to take a lifetime off before the Finals?
• The Wings’ early playoff exit was a major disappointment. After the way the season went, it wasn’t particularly surprising, but it hurt nonetheless. Not as much as the end of last season’s playoffs, but still not fun.

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly Part One...

The Good

• Let’s start with the obvious. Herm 2 Hockeytown was one of the coolest things I’ve ever been a part of. The extent to which the Red Wings community reaches amazes me. Not only did we bring Herm here to watch a game, but we also raised over $5,000 for Children’s Hospital. Hanging out at Hockeytown, singing Happy Birthday to Jimmy Howard, the tin foil hats, post-gaming at the Town Pump, and visiting Greektown in the middle of the night were just some of the highlights of the night. When I first started blogging, I swore I’d never meet anyone off of the internet. Boy am I glad I broke that promise. There are some truly great people out there in Red Wings Nation.
• One of the best legacies of H2H was the creation of the #redwingscommune a little while later. None of that would have happened without the real life connections we made that weekend. We had Commune gatherings all over the Metro area during the playoffs, and I really think we helped each other survive. We ended up with a whole array of lingo like donut goalies, Drunk Lebda, and Homerbait and there’s nobody I would rather have been with at the end of Game Five.
• At one of our Commune gatherings, we came up with an idea to have a Tin Foil Flashmob at the Joe. Originally, we wanted to rally people to wrap the building with tin foil, but decided that that idea was impractical. Somehow, it evolved into a plan to recruit dancers while passing out tin foil hats outside of the Joe. It was an absolutely absurd idea, but we had a blast. It was crazy and miles away from anything I ever imagined myself doing, but I loved being a part of it.
• Jimmy Howard was a revelation this season. I don’t think many people expected him to perform the way he did. I figured he was a temporary solution until one of the younger goalies was ready for the NHL. He looked awful during the beginning of the season. He managed to turn things around, though, and took over the starter’s job. He was nothing short of brilliant on several occasions. Here’s hoping he can keep it up next season.
• The Olympics were phenomenal. I could’ve done with a different ending, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t glued to my TV for the majority of the tournament.
• The fact that Andreas Lilja was able to come back after almost a year on IR was great. I really thought his career was over and that Mickey Redmond was crazy when he started talking about Lils being close to coming back during one of the broadcasts. He provided a much-needed steady influence on the third pairing.
• Game Seven in the first round and Game Four in the second round were amazingly fun. Watching Game Seven at Kukla’s with the commune was a blast, and the Mule’s rampage in Game Four was one for the ages. They were definitely the highlights of the playoffs.
• Brendan Shanahan joining Twitter was one of the best events of the season. That guy makes my life. I expected him to just twitter boring things, but he’s been nothing short of entertaining.
• The Versus announcers once again created another fun new word for us. I’m a big fan of “danglelicious” and feel like a bit of a failure because I don’t use it more often. I’m going to work on that over the summer.
• Another Versus highlight was the addition of Darren McCarty as an intermission commentator. He looked pretty nervous at first, but seems to have settled into the job. It’s nice to have someone on there to make their intermission reports tolerable. If you didn’t already love him, the time they called him a homer and he said that he had four reasons to be a homer surely melted your heart.
• Watching Jimmy Howard go after Sidney Crosby was one of the highlights of the regular season. It even inspired Henrik Zetterberg to deliver one of my favorite quotes of the year: “I saw Jimmy coming in with his glove and Crosby wasn’t there anymore.” Perfect.
• The post-Olympic run that the Wings went on was a blast. We’d been waiting all season for the real Wings to show up, and this stretch catapulted them into the 5th playoff seed. It was the only real display of Red Wing hockey that we got to see all season.
• The NHL’s History Will Be Made commercials were fabulous. Some of the ones toward the end were a little ridiculous, but the initial concept was brilliant. The Datsyuk/Zetterberg one was my personal favorite, though I might be slightly biased in that regard. Other than the fact that it featured my two favorite current players, I liked the fact that it required a little bit of hockey knowledge to understand the “What if” question.
  
• The speechless commercial that debuted during the Finals was pretty awesome, too.
• Johan Franzen didn’t quite live up to his mouthguard-snatching from last season, but I was a big fan of his diving pantomime during a game against Chicago.
  

On a personal note:

• Getting to know you crazy sunshines online and in real life made this season one of the most memorable ever, despite the frustration it induced. It truly was fantastic.
• Meeting Steve Yzerman in November was obviously one of my personal highlights. I still can’t really believe that actually happened.
• My friend getting her foot stuck in one of the seats at the Joe was one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. She’s still a little bit bitter about the lack of help that she received from me and the fact that I wrote about it and mentioned the incident on TOV.
• I also managed to make it to more games this season than ever before. This included not one, but two playoff games. Sitting down by the glass with Sara and TPL Mom against San Jose was incredible.
• At one of those games, I got the opportunity to go out on the ice to participate in the turkey bowling game during intermission. I was an incredible failure at it, but my team still managed to win. We got free tickets to another game and got to keep our turkeys. This resulted in my little brother wandering around the Joe carrying a frozen turkey for the next two periods. The pictures we have are priceless.

The Red Wings at Cedar Point...

I recently headed down to Cedar Point with some of the ladies of the Commune, Sara and Amanda. Now, the Red Wings and roller coasters are two of the great loves of my life, so it was only natural that the conversation turned to comparisons of Wings players and Cedar Point rides in short order. What else were we supposed to do while waiting in lines all day? We tweeted most of our ride comparisons while we were at the park, but I thought it would be a good idea to flesh out some of our logic and reasoning (terms that I always use loosely when referring to Commune events). I’ll start with some of our lamer choices and work up to the Brett Lebda coaster, which I think was our master stroke.

We named Mike Babcock the mayor of Frontier Town. It's rough and tumble and outdoorsy, just like the Wings' fearless leader. Can you imagine anyone else in charge?

Junior Gemini=Mattias Ritola
Cedar Point has two kiddie coasters, so we decided to name both of them in honor of prospects in Grand Rapids. It seemed fitting. We went with this one for Ritola in honor of Andy.

Woodstock Express=Jakub Kindl
This is the other kiddie coaster at CP, and it was named for the Wings’ top defensive prospect.

Cedar Creek Mine Ride=Derek Meech
Nobody ever remembers that this ride exists. It’s pretty lame, and one could argue for its inclusion with the kiddie coasters that have been previously discussed. It’s decent enough to ride if you’ve got time to kill and you’re bored, but there are much better things to be doing with limited CP time.

Iron Dragon=Jiri Hudler
I don’t recall the exact reasoning behind this one, but it had something to do with being short, spitting water at people, and being vaguely Asian.

Thunder Canyon=Dan Cleary
There really wasn’t a lot of thought behind this one. We realized at one point that we’d forgotten to name a ride for Cleary and happened to be in line for this one at the time. It sort of works, because I was really excited to ride it because I wanted to get wet, but the first two times I was the only dry person on the raft. After some debate, we decided to try riding one last time so I could get wet and the third time around, I finally got soaked. It’s kind of like how Cleary came in with all these expectations, and didn’t really work out until he was given a shot in Detroit. Plus, we figured Newfies would like water.

Demon Drop=Marian Hossa
Demon Drop, an old favorite of mine, packed up and moved to a different park.

Skyhawk=Drew Miller
This is one of my favorite non-coasters at the park. It’s quite simple in nature, but manages to be very entertaining. It’s not unique, but provides an adequate break from the roller coaster routine.

Mean Streak=Gordie Howe
This was a tough one. I have a secret love for the Mean Streak because I’ve been lucky enough to ride it when the brakes on the big drop were not running, so I’ve experienced it in all of its glory. However, it got old and rickety and had to slow down to keep it from falling apart. It still packs a mean punch, though. When you get off of it, it feels like you just took an elbow to the teeth.

MaXair=Valtteri Filppula
As far as I’m concerned, this is the crown jewel of non-coasters at CP. It’s flashy, exciting, and spectacular to look at. It also has great hair. I rode a ride just like MaXair at King’s Island a few years before it was built at CP, so it even takes care of the older brother that looks the same part. The more I think about it, the more I like it.

Wildcat=Justin Abdelkader
It runs around, slamming you into the side of the car. It’s not the biggest, the fastest, or the most exciting, but it’s a good, solid ride that’s a lot of fun. It also happens to be Sara’s BFF.

Snake River Falls=Chris Osgood
We decided to go with the water rides for the goalies. Snake River Falls was never great, but once the old log ride got taken down, it was the main water attraction at the park. However, it was shut down the day we were at the park, kind of like Chris Osgood this season.

Shoot the Rapids=Jimmy Howard
Shoot the Rapids is the shiny, new centerpiece attraction that’s taking all of the glory away from Snake River Falls. Like its Red Wings counterpart, the new log ride has stumbled out of the gate. It was slated to be open at the beginning of the season, but has had issues that have prevented it from opening on schedule. I’m sure once its issues get sorted out, it’ll wow the crowds.

Sir Rub-a-Dub’s Tubs=Thomas McCollum
It’s a kiddie water ride. Get it?

Wicked Twister=Tomas Holmstrom
Neither one is particularly flashy, but both are incredibly amusing. Homer is known for his backside, while Wicked Twister is known for going backwards. It actually kind of looks a little bit like the way Homer skates, now that I think about it.

Blue Streak=Brian Rafalski
Both are little, old, adorable, and possibly Polish. This was the comparison that started this whole mess. Neither one packs much punch, but Blue Streak is a must-ride at Cedar Point.

Gemini=Kris Draper and Kirk Maltby
Even though we could have gone the obvious Eurotwin route on this one, we decided to go with the Wings’ legendary BFFs. Amanda even went as far as to name the red train The Ginger Rocket for Drapes, which left Maltby as the blue train. Even though Gemini is past its prime, I absolutely adore the ride. It’s still one of my favorites after all these years, just like the old Grind Liners.

Raptor=Johan Franzen
Raptor very nearly became named after Filppula because it flips, but we decided that it was too ferocious for him. We went with the Mule because it seemed to suit his power and strength. It can really knock you around, but manages to combine that with a little bit of grace as it swoops through barrel rolls. And at the very end, it steals your mouthguard.

Power Tower=Jonathan Ericsson
It’s big and impressive, but just kind of stands there. It’s not nearly as exciting as it looks.

Magnum=Henrik Zetterberg
Magnum’s a fantastic all-around ride and one of my very favorites. It’s a traditional out-and-back ride that I think suits Z’s two-way play. Magnum doesn’t get nearly enough attention these days, even though it’s much better than its flashier counterparts. It’s solid, dependable, and always delivers. I love it.

Maverick=Pavel Datsyuk
Maverick is neither the fastest nor the tallest ride in the park, but it packs a lot of punch. It twists and turns and whips you around, and at the end you find yourself checking your pockets to make sure none of your valuables are missing. It’s a perfect match for wily Pavel.

Corkscrew=Todd Bertuzzi
This was fitting because of the way Corkscrew twists and turns over the midway. It seemed like the perfect metaphor for Bert’s spin-o-ramas. Later on, as we were walking by, a train was pulling out of the station. A guy on the train yelled, “We’re gonna die!!!” It was perfect. He knew what he was getting himself into.

Millennium Force=Nicklas Lidstrom
Quite simply, both of them are perfect. Millennium is stunning. It’s by far the best ride at the park and even after ten years (which makes me feel ridiculously old) of operation and being surpassed in height and speed by younger rides, you could make a very strong argument that it’s still the best roller coaster on the planet. That sounds an awful lot like a certain defenseman that I know.

Top Thrill Dragster=Darren Helm
Dragster has blazing speed, but not a lot of finish. It launches like a rocket, just like Helmer on a breakaway, but lacks the substance of Magnum or Maverick. In the end, it’s always a bit of a disappointment, but manages to keep you coming back for more hoping that there’ll be a better ending the next time around.


Disaster Transport=Brett Lebda
The Lebda coaster was by far my favorite name association. It was absolutely spot on. There’s the routine of, “Oh yeah, I forgot about that ride. I guess we can go on it. Oh god, this ride sucks. What were we thinking?” There’s also the cheesy theming, black lights, and glow paint that you queue through as you enter the Lebda Lair. Like Amanda said, it was, “so very Lebda.” Anyone who’s ever been there knows what we’re talking about.

That’s all I’ve got. Any thoughts, additions, or alternate suggestions?

Hockeytown Garage Sale...

Last weekend, I met up with Amanda and Courtney at Hockeytown Authentics for the used equipment garage sale. We had a blast even though I’m pretty sure everyone else in attendance thought we were raving lunatics. That’s actually pretty par for the course for me as I often wonder why society lets me venture out in public.

We had a great time geeking out over the game-used jerseys, sticks, skates, and gloves. Amanda and I fist-bumped with Zetterberg’s used gloves. We totally felt the Eurotwin power in that moment. We were also amused by the fact that I was able to walk up to a pile of skates on a table and immediately pick out Z’s. Malik was not impressed with my equipment identification skills though. He says it was too easy. Whatever.

Another highlight was the Brett Lebda jersey and autographed stick. You’d better believe there was some RAAAAGGGGHHHHing going on when we posed for pictures with those.

One of the creepiest things I’ve ever seen was hidden away on a shelf at the store. This is a sleeping bag meant to look like a hockey player. The head is a detachable pillow so when you’re not using your sleeping bag (that feels like it’s lined with plastic grocery bags) you can cuddle with the disembodied head. It was selling for $50. For $5, I would’ve bought it just to use as a conversation piece.


The best moment, though, had to be when Courtney found a little goal light on a stick. She turned it on and commented that it would be a lot more fun if it made the goal horn noise too. Naturally, I whipped out my cell phone and played the goal horn ringtone on repeat. Then we took a video and pretended to celebrate the imaginary goal. It was pretty clear that everyone around us thought we were insane. This was the result:



Other things that amused us:

• Homer’s stick with absolutely no curve.
• The many repairs done to Homer’s game-worn sweater.
• Realizing that Ericsson's stick is taller than I am.
• Datsyuk’s pants that had giant holes cut into them and hemmed that way.
• Getting into Draper’s pants.
• The wide variety of Pasha sticks.
• Discovering a horrific puck bunny t-shirt. None of use even understood what correlation “It’s raining men” had with the Wings or hockey.
• Used equipment bags were selling for $500-700. As far as I could tell, all of the players’ numbers were accounted for so I don’t know that anyone actually purchased one.
• Amazing kids’ helmet-style hats and inexplicably green Cat in the Hat-esque ones.

I didn’t buy any of the equipment, but I did raid the autographed book clearance table. I snagged a copy of 48 Hours with the Detroit Red Wings that was autographed by Brett Hull and On Tour with the Red Wings & Stanley 2008 signed by Homer. The 48 Hours book has a busted dust jacket, but both of them were way below list price. I also picked up birthday presents for my three siblings and a coloring book for myself for a grand total of $68. The coloring book has a jersey math section. I love it. I’d consider our visit a success. I really had no intention of buying anything because I didn’t figure I’d find anything in my price range.

After our adventures at the store, we walked next door and hung out at Joe Kool’s talking hockey for a couple of hours. We reminisced about the good old days of the Wings-Avs rivalry (Courtney’s a die hard Colorado fan) and how much we missed hating each other’s teams. We talked about the Tomas Holmstrom-Dustin Byfuglien debate and why we think Homer’s in a class of his own. We told the story of H2H. I got a ridiculously small yet overpriced pizza. The whole day was fabulous. Check out the rest of the pictures on Photobucket.

Nothing Lost...

Earlier this year, I referred to this as “The Lost Season.” I was wrong. We’re not celebrating another Stanley Cup in Hart Plaza, so you could call this season a failure, but we gained much, much more than we lost. In this season of stress and anxiety and agony, a great big community came together like never before. We’ve made a family that I never would have thought possible. Looking at all of the things gained, it’s hard to use the word “lost” in association with this season.

Sure, the trip to Sweden was a bust.
Sure, the first half of the season was a disaster.
Sure, it seemed like this team was being held together with bubblegum and paperclips for the better part of the year.
Sure, most of us were bald by Christmas from pulling out our hair.
Sure, we got called conspiracy theorists and the Tin Foil Hat Brigade by national media and bloggers.
Sure, we saw some of the most absurd calls and non-calls in recent memory go against the Wings.
Sure, the playoffs didn’t end the way we wanted them to, and today’s a day of mourning in Red Wings nation.

But…
We still brought Herm to Hockeytown.
We still raised over $5,000 for Children’s Hospital.
We still started The Obstructed View, which has been one of the more fun projects I’ve been a part of.
We still created a #redwingscommune and an entire lexicon of “communisms:” DrunkLebda, SoberLebda, donut goalies, RAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHH, DinosaurLebda, PirateLebda, and Homerbait, just to name a few.
We still organized a flash mob to dance outside of the Joe wearing tin foil hats, and even ended up getting the mob’s headwear of choice banned from the arena.
We still turned a bunch of fake internet friends into a community of real life friends.
We still had a support group to hug and cry with at the Post last night, and there is no group of people I would rather have been with in that moment.
I still got to see and do some amazingly awesome things with some equally awesome people.
And maybe, just maybe, we learned to appreciate how blessed we’ve been here in Hockeytown for the last nineteen years.

I’m a Red Wings fan today, and I’ll be one tomorrow, and the day after that, and the day after that. I’ll be a Red Wings fan in June when we watch another team take home our Cup, and I’ll be a Red Wings fan in July when I’m desperately trolling the internet for a shred of hockey news. I’ll be a Red Wings fan in August when I’m bored out of my mind, and I’ll be a Red Wings fan in September when I’m anxiously gearing up for the season. And I will most definitely be a Red Wings fan in October when the season starts up again. And yeah, you’d better believe I’m proud.

Red Wings 3, Sharks 4 (OT) (0-3): Post Game Snipes...

• I went down to the #tinfoilflashmob with every intention of dancing with the crowd and then heading back to Hockeytown to watch the game with the Commune. Instead, an incredibly generous and as yet anonymous member of the flash mob provided me with an extra ticket for free. I started out in the second to last row of the upper bowl, right in front of the press box. By the first intermission, Sara had located a seat near her in the second row of the lower bowl and I headed down there. Halfway through the third period, the people in the seats next to her and TPL Mom left, so I scooted down into the front row. It was quite an upgrade. I’m so lucky to be surrounded by such wonderful Red Wings fans.
• Why was Brett Lebda in the lineup? Even better question: why was he ever out on the ice with Jonathan Ericsson?
• You know why I love Detroit fans? From the back of the upper bowl, we saw San Jose commit a hand pass in the offensive zone and all started screaming in unison. I challenge you to find that kind of detailed hockey smarts in Phoenix or Nashville.
• I literally spent most of the game hunched forward, clutching my rally rag like a security blanket. I occasionally put on the tin foil hat that was smuggled into the Joe for me. Why do I even bother going out in public?
• If I’m not mistaken, I have now witnessed five goal reviews in the last four games I’ve attended at the Joe. Zetterberg’s was the first that’s gone against the Wings.
• I made it on the big screen at least three times. This has been a lifelong goal of mine that I finally realized last night.
• How was Pavel Datsyuk’s line that bad defensively last night? Pav should never be -2.
• Oh Jimmy, you broke my heart last night. The Wings needed more from him. I understand that he’s a rookie, but he should want some of those goals back.
• Zetterberg scored his goal right in front of me. If there hadn’t been glass in between us, I could’ve reached out and touched him. I even caught it on film (in pixels?):
  

GP Review:
12. STAY OUT OF THE BOX!!! Even if it means playing no-contact girly hockey.
Six penalties is still way too many for this team to take. It wasn’t nearly as ridiculous as it has been, but the really killer things were the non-calls that should’ve gone the Wings’ way. I don’t know how much of it was on camera on the broadcast, but missed trips, high sticks, cross-checks, and holdings had us reaching for our smuggled in tin foil hats more than once.

11. The Wings need to start better. The beginning of Game Two was a disaster wrapped in a blanket of nightmares.
The first period was actually pretty good. The Wings were all set to head to intermission with a two-goal lead until San Jose got on the board with literally two seconds left in the period.

10. I want to see more production from the second line. If I’m not mistaken, the Zetterberg unit hasn’t tallied a point yet this series.
Early on, I had Z tagged for a goal. It was one of those things where you could just tell by the way he was skating. I was more than a little excited that he was standing within an arm’s reach of me when he scored his goal (that counted).

9. Somebody needs to shut down Pavelski. He’s scored half of San Jose’s goals so far this series.
He still picked up an assist, but the Wings did managed to prevent him from putting the puck in the net himself.

8. On the off chance that the Wings get any powerplays, they need to make them count. Special teams have been make or break all playoffs.
One of their powerplays only lasted seven seconds. The other was unsuccessful. If you look me in the eye and tell me that the Sharks only committed two penalties all night (plus the one that led to the penalty shot), I’ll call you a liar. Go ahead. Try it.

7. San Jose has had too much success at getting traffic to the front of the net. The Wings need to adjust their game and keep them to the perimeter.
No, no, no, no, no. This needs to happen.

6. Home sweet home: They’re back at the Joe where the Hockeytown faithful will be out en masse. Take advantage of the love from the crowd.
They did start strongly, but faded toward the end. By the beginning of overtime, you could feel a sense of dread in the building. People were still chanting and cheering, but I don’t think there was a lot of optimism.

5. What ridiculousness will have you reaching for your tin foil hat tonight?
The tin foil hats themselves were banned, which is awesome for fans of irony. The goal reviews in and of themselves were enough to be diving for the safety of a tin foil hat.

4. Would it kill somebody to win a faceoff here and there?
Abdelkader was actually the only one who lost more faceoffs than he won for the Wings. Somehow, it still seemed like they never won one. Maybe they just kept losing the really important ones.

3. The Wings haven’t done a particularly good job entering the Sharks’ zone. They’re losing too many rushes at the blue line.
Case in point: the overtime winner.

2. Jason Williams (Who?) is in the lineup again in place of Patrick Eaves. What are the chances that he does something useful this time around?
Do not get me started. I’ve gone from general indifference and honestly forgetting about him at several points this season to a strong dislike.

1. The Wings have made a habit of playing best when their backs are against the wall. I know they’re not facing elimination tonight, but they absolutely can’t afford to go down by three games. They can still pull this out if they play like the Wings team we saw in Game Seven. Make it happen, boys.
Well, so much for my pep talk...

Hero: Henrik Zetterberg
He was the best player on the ice for the Wings. That was most definitely Playoff Zetterberg last night.

Villain: Jason Williams (Who?)
During the final two periods, he shot no less than two pucks directly at my face. I’m convinced that he stumbled across SSDD and saw my gentle mocking and wanted to put another puck through the glass and my head. Oh, and his 49-foot wide slapshot in overtime led to San Jose’s break the other way and their goal. We miss you, Patrick Eaves.

Final Thought:
I’m trying to cling to optimism, but it’s not working very well. I really did have a great time at the pre-game festivities and during the game though.

Red Wings vs. Oilers GP...

I wasn’t going to do a GP today since I won’t be able to watch the game, but I didn’t want my 300th post to be a generic leaving-town-check-back-on-Monday post. As it so happens, I'm leaving town today. In fact, I'm posting this from the airport (Bless you, wireless internet). I thought it was particularly nice that the Wings had three days off before playing back-to-back games on the one weekend that I’m on vacation. I’ll be living it up in New Orleans at the wedding of one of my most beloved Splash Trashers and probably overloading Google’s score texting service checking for updates since I’m about 98% sure that nobody’s ever even heard of hockey down there. I may or may not be up and running in time for the Pittsburgh game on Monday.

1. The Wings have been playing well recently, which has made for a much cheerier bunch of Red Wing fans. Their random West Coast break has the potential to be a momentum-killer though. Can their strong play continue tonight?
2. The word on the street is that Jonathan Ericsson will be making his glorious return to the lineup tonight. Will he make us miss Brett Lebda?
3. Edmonton’s exactly the kind of team that the Wings like to overlook and get embarrassed by. Are they going to bother showing up tonight? Sixty minutes please, boys.
4. What is Tomas Holmstrom going to do tonight to make Wings fans swoon?

The Wings didn’t get any help during their layoff. Calgary and Nashville both picked up all of the points possible during their games. I don’t know what the deal is, but the out of town scores never seem to break the Wings’ way. I guess they’re going to have to do it on their own. The good news is that the Wings now have a game in hand on Calgary and two on Nashville.

Don’t forget to enter the Contest of Insanity. There are a lot of good ones already, but more is always better, so keep them coming.

Red Wings 2, Flames 4: Post Game Snipes...

• The first period was some pretty boring hockey. Neither team looked like it was willing to take a risk, and play was pretty choppy.
• I was incredibly concerned when the Flames scored first, but the wings actually managed to rebound well from the goal. Too bad they weren't able to do that in the third period.
• Via WingsLive, Brett Lebda announced that he was Single. Get in line, ladies. I know you're interested. To be fair, he said that Darren Helm was also single.
• Pavel Datsyuk and Tomas Holmstrom came out of the Olympic break looking like guys with something to prove. I think that Homer staying home with his injury was one of the best things that could've happened for the Wings.
• The Wings' second goal came off of an absolutely classic Red Wing powerplay. There was tape-to-tape passing, a goal, and a Tomas Holmstrom screen for the ages. I miss seeing that on a regular basis.
• The Wings looked good during the second period, which gave me a sense of false hope for the outcome of the game. Naturally, the third period was a depressing let down.
• I'm more and more convinced every game that Henrik Zetterberg has something nagging that's hampering his play. Too bad there's no cushion in the standings that would allow the team to give him a couple of games off.
• Jarome Igninla hadn't scored on the Wings in his last 19 regular season games. The media made a big deal about this today, which naturally meant that he would break that streak during this game.
• The Wings only mustered four shots in the third period. That's unacceptable. Especially in a game as important as this one was.
• Nashville and Calgary both won tonight. This counts as a disaster. The Wings now find themselves outside of the playoff picture again.

GP Answers:
1. Jimmy Howard has struggled a little since the Olympic break. The layoff seems to have left him a little rusty. Can he hold up in this key game against Calgary?
This loss certainly wasn't his fault, but he's still struggling with his rebounds. They're not nearly as bad as they were at the beginning of the season, but they've become an issue again since the break.

2. Datsyuk and Bertuzzi both missed practice today. Both are supposed to be ready to go on Tuesday, but if I've learned one thing from this season, it's that the worst-case scenario almost always happens. Will their nagging issues affect their play significantly? It would be a shame to see Datsyuk's post-Olympic tear suffer because of a flu bug.
Datsyuk didn't look like his illness slowed him down at all. I thought Bertuzzi had a pretty solid game as well. He wasn't spectacular, but he looked particularly good on the shift after he got out of the penalty box in the third.

3. Over the last little while, the Wings' powerplay has slowly started to become respectable. Will their special teams keep up the good work, or will one of them start to falter? In the recent past, either the PK or the powerplay seems to be strong, but not both at the same time.
Like I said before, the Wings' second powerplay was classic. The others? Not so much.

4. From what I read today, Jonathan Ericsson is going to be returning to the lineup tomorrow. How is he going to respond to his benching? Getting sat in favor of Brett Lebda has to be demoralizing for anybody, but especially a guy like Ericsson with his Adonis-like qualities.
I didn't really notice Ericsson very much during the game. For a defenseman like him, that's a very good thing. He managed to stay +/- neutral in 13 minutes of ice time tonight.

Cookies and Cupcakes for Tomas Holmstrom
Because I love him.

Henrik Zetterberg gets the Golden Facepalm
Yeah, I went there. There was something supremely frustrating about his blown chance early on. I can't quite explain why, and this is really tough for me because lord knows I love me some Z, but...I don't know. That one chance just made me shake my head.

What I learned:
Looking up at the top eight again isn't fun. At all.

Red Wings vs. Flames GP...

1. Jimmy Howard has struggled a little since the Olympic break. The layoff seems to have left him a little rusty. Can he hold up in this key game against Calgary?
2. Datsyuk and Bertuzzi both missed practice today. Both are supposed to be ready to go on Tuesday, but if I’ve learned one thing from this season, it’s that the worst-case scenario almost always happens. Will their nagging issues affect their play significantly? It would be a shame to see Datsyuk’s post-Olympic tear suffer because of a flu bug.
3. Over the last little while, the Wings’ powerplay has slowly started to become respectable. Will their special teams keep up the good work, or will one of them start to falter? In the recent past, either the PK or the powerplay seems to be strong, but not both at the same time.
4. From what I read today, Jonathan Ericsson is going to be returning to the lineup tomorrow. How is he going to respond to his benching? Getting sat in favor of Brett Lebda has to be demoralizing for anybody, but especially a guy like Ericsson with his Adonis-like qualities.

It’s looking more and more like it’s going to be a three-horse race for the 7th and 8th seeds in the West. Five points separate the 5/6 teams from 7th place, and there are 4 points between Calgary in 9th and St. Louis in 10th. There’s a pack of teams from 10th to 13th that could definitely challenge if they put together a strong run (Anaheim *cough* Anaheim), and catching up to LA, Colorado, and even Vancouver and Phoenix isn’t out of the question for the Wings if they get going, but I’d put my money on the boys fighting with Nashville and Calgary for those last precious playoff seeds. Losing to Calgary tomorrow isn’t an option for the Wings, but you already knew that. I just hope that they do too.

Red Wings 4, Senators 1: Post Game Snipes...

• It felt like it had been three years since the Wings won a game. They needed these two points. Of course, all of the teams they needed to lose tonight won, so there was no improvement in the standings.
• The little pre-game ceremony for the Olympians was very nice. (And for a change, the Wings didn’t totally disintegrate after a ceremony.) We learned that Homer’s son skates exactly like his dad and Bertuzzi’s son has the same haircut. I liked the fact that they recognized the guys from Ottawa too.
• I hope I wasn’t the only one who was thrilled beyond belief when Maltby scored the Wings’ first goal.
• Homer left the game after re-aggravating his injury. It’s looking less likely that he’s going to be playing for Team Sweden and more likely that Franzen’s going to be taking his place.
• It was nice to see the powerplay working for a change.
• After the Sens’ first goal, the Wings started to sit back, and I was afraid that we were going to get to watch the same tired script play out for the zillionth time this season. Luckily, the Wings were able to get it together and hang onto their lead.
  

GP Answers:
1. This is the last game before the Olympic break, and losing it really isn’t an option. Can the Wings pull off a win so we can have slightly less stress over the next two weeks?
Indeed they did. I know I’m going to sleep a little better during the break. The Wings’ position didn’t really change, but a game like that should allow everyone to sleep just a little more easily.

2. If Maltby decides to have his shoulder operated on, there’s a very real possibility that tonight could be his last game in a Wings uniform. It would put him out of the lineup until the end of the regular season, and at this point, there’s no guarantee that there will be more games beyond that. Can he make this game memorable?
How about scoring that first goal? If this really was his last game in a Wings uniform, I’m glad that it was one that he and the rest of the team can be proud of. Regardless of what happens, he’s a guy who I’ve always liked, dating back to his days on the Grind Line. It also speaks to the way the Wings’ organization treats its players.

3. Meech as a forward? How’s that going to work out for the Wings?
He didn’t play much, but managed to pick up an assist in his 4:29 of ice time. This is one of the reasons that I think he’s more valuable than Lebda is. Not only does he make less money, but he can also fill in up front in an emergency.

4. What percentage of this game are the Wings going to show up to play? It’s anybody’s guess.
This was definitely one of the Wings’ most consistent efforts of the season. There was a stretch in the second period when they looked like they were going to sit back and let Ottawa take the play to them, but they recovered quickly. Overall, I was pleased.

Cookies and Cupcakes for Pavel Datsyuk
He was the best player on the ice again. That shot he took from between his legs was incredible. So was one of his rushes that he nearly buried. He’s really been cranking things up lately after a sleepy start to the season. Let’s hope he comes out of the Olympics with the same kind of fire.

An Extra Stick Tap for Kirk Maltby
Just because.

Todd Bertuzzi gets the Golden Facepalm
He named his son Tag. And let him have a faux-hawk/mullet. I’m not okay with that.

What I Learned:
The Wings continue to outclass every organization in professional sports. Maybe things like the pre-game ceremony and the Maltby situation don’t mean much, but they make me smile. We’re pretty lucky here in Hockeytown.

Good News (Yes, You Read that Correctly)...

As I’m sure you know by now, Niklas Kronwall is slated for a return to the lineup tomorrow. This is huge for the Wings. His presence should have a trickle-down effect on all of the defensive pairings, as well as the offense. Having him in the lineup allows us to rid ourselves of either Lebda or Meech. My money’s on Meech sitting because Lebda occasionally has flashes of brilliance in which he appears to be a real, live NHL defenseman. Granted, they’re few and far between, but they do exist. Meech just goes out there and skates around and does…I don’t really know. He should be an evangelical preacher because every time he sets foot on the ice, a million Wings fans start praying. Stuart and Kronwall were dynamite together before Georges Laraque saw fit to remove him from the Wings’ lineup, and his presence may help settle Stuart down after a rough patch. He’s also been sorely missed on the powerplay over the last couple of months. I have no idea what the Wings’ percentage is since the beginning of November, but it has to be close to single digits. How excited are you for a powerplay unit that doesn’t feature Derek Meech?

I was also surprised to hear that Andreas Lilja is potentially nearing a return. A couple of days ago, Mickey Redmond mentioned that he was close to returning, but I think we fans universally wrote that off as crazy talk. This impression was confirmed when Ken Holland said that nothing had changed regarding Lilja’s status. Lo and behold today, though, Lilja said that he had gone 13 straight days without a headache. Should he reach that elusive 14-day mark, he could potentially be cleared to play. (On a side note, we’re coming up on 11 months since his concussion. Can you imagine how rotten of a mood you’d be in if you’d been having almost constant headaches for that long? I’m pretty sure even my dog would’ve stopped liking me by now.) This would be another huge step for the defense because it would mean that a) we would also be rid of Lebda and b) Jonathan Ericsson could be paired with a more experienced defenseman who he could potentially learn something (good) from. I’ve been a critic of Lilja in the past, but he was looking pretty solid last season before he broke his head, and at any rate, he has to be better than Lebda.

On top of all this, Jason Williams is nearing a return to the lineup, Tomas Holmstrom is hoping to be back soon, and Johan Franzen is considering a miraculous pre-Olympic break return. I’d probably prefer that he wait until after the break because it’s basically two weeks of free rehab for him and there’s no sense rushing him back. I have no idea what this means for the salary cap, but I'll leave that to smarter folks to figure out.

If I were a member of another Western Conference organization, I’d be looking over my shoulder right about now. The Wings have been hanging in there on the periphery of the playoff race like some kind of zombie that you just can’t kill. Now that they’re finally getting healthy, I can’t imagine that the other teams in the West are thrilled about the idea of the Wings creeping up behind them.

We have a little less than three weeks until the Olympic break. A lot can happen in that amount of time. Let’s hope they’re good things. Also, it’s unbelievably fun to be writing about happy news for a change. All this excitement has put me in a pretty good mood. I’m starting to feel a strange sensation that may in seasons past have been called optimism.

Random semi-hockey related quote of the day:
My dad, while assessing the swelling on my newly-sprained ankle: “Just be glad you’re not a hockey player so you don’t have to worry about fitting it into a skate so you can go back out and play.”

Red Wings 3, Blackhawks 4 (SO): Post Game Snipes...

• The Wings took four penalties during the first period. Four. One was a joke, but all that time on the PK really took the life out of the team.
• They actually started pretty well considering that they had played less than 24 hours previously.
• Nick Lidstrom’s last-minute goal in the first period was almost identical to that chance he had in the final seconds of Game 7 of the Finals last season. All things considered, I would’ve rather he buried that other one.
• The Wings had a 10-minute stretch in the first without a shot on net. I realize that they were on the PK for most of the time, but that’s still kind of pathetic.
• Patrick Eaves got into a fight late in the first. I was surprised. I think that was kind of the general consensus amongst Wings fans on Twitter too. Even Babcock said that he didn't know Eaves could fight. He did a pretty good job handling himself. He got taken down, but I thought he got better swings in than Versteeg did.
• During the first intermission, Mike Milbury said that the trailing ref and linesmen had “courage” to make the call on the Ott goal yesterday. Apparently he’s confused courage with incompetence. We have a different definition of courage here in Detroit, sunshine.
• The Wings scored another powerplay goal. One more game with a conversion, and I’ll be willing to pronounce it functional again. The play was absolutely vintage Eurotwins hockey. Datsyuk mad a strong play bringing it into the zone and fighting through what seemed like the entire Blackhawks team to dish it to Zetterberg. He took the pass awkwardly, fought to control it, and buried a great shot. Let’s see more of that, please.
• Patrick Sharp’s goal in the second period came off of a pretty play that had the NBC guys gushing. It looked great, but it probably wouldn’t have happened if the Wings had bothered playing defense on that play. The look Brad Stuart gave Brett Lebda after the puck went in the net kind of said it all.
• Datsyuk was all over the place this afternoon. Now that Lidstrom looks like he's gotten going offensively, if the Wings can get Pav to start putting pucks in the net, things will be looking pretty good.
• We missed seeing the live view of Eaves’ tying goal because NBC was showing needless replays. What a joke broadcast. Everybody was confused because we were hearing the live call from the PBP guys, but it didn’t match up with the replays on the screen or anything that had happened so far today. Way to go, guys, way to go.
• The five minutes of overtime were insane. If that can’t sell hockey to a national audience, I don’t know what will.
• Both of the Eurotwins had glorious chances during OT, but neither one of them could finish.
• Datsyuk’s shootout goal was ridiculous. There’s not really any way to accurately capture it in words, but I think ridiculous comes closest.
• Bertuzzi’s goal was pretty awesome too. It was a good thing that he scored on it because otherwise he would’ve looked kind of silly. It was especially awesome because of his use of Brian Campbell’s patented spin move.
• After Hossa scored to send the shootout into extra rounds, I knew the Wings were done. I just don’t think Cleary has the moves to get it done in a situation like that. I’m not sure why Filppula doesn’t get a shot in the shootouts when they go to extra rounds. He’s got some hands.
• Even though this game had the same result as yesterday’s did, I feel much better about it. Instead of blowing a two-goal lead, the Wings fought back from a two-goal deficit. Plus, there weren’t any moments that had me yelling at my TV and considering if I had the willpower to walk away from the NHL once and for all.
• Patrick Eaves’ post-game interview was pretty good. I liked his description of his fight. “We hit each other in the face.” Awesome. On the other hand, I don’t understand how he can talk with all of that hair in front of his face. I got side bangs a week ago for the first time in almost 10 years, and it took all of two minutes for me to realize that I couldn’t stand it. They’ve been bobby pinned out of the way ever since. Eaves could use a few of those.
  

GP Answers:
1. It’s been less than 24 hours since the start of the Dallas game (Oh, NHL, your wonders never cease), and while I’ve never been a professional hockey player, I can’t imagine that the quick turnaround—combined with flying home from Dallas—is easy on the guys. Chicago also has a short turnaround, so we should be in for a spectacular, fast-paced treat for the national TV audience. What are the odds that the Wings will be awake for the start of the game today?
They came out looking pretty good in the first halves of each of the periods, but seemed to fade toward the end. They looked much better as the third period came to an end, so maybe they found their second wind.

2. The last time the Wings got screwed on a goal call against Dallas, they fell into a pathetic spiral of hopelessness. According to HNIC last night, the organization is “irate.” Will the team come out looking like they’ve got some fire, or let Chicago walk all over them like they did in their last two meetings?
They didn’t exactly look angry or seem like they were playing to make a statement, but they at least put up a fight.

3. I haven’t heard if Leino or May will be in the lineup today, but it probably doesn’t matter much. Either way, I have to ask: what new level of uselessness will they accomplish today?
I’m told that May spent one commercial break jawing with one of the Hawks. I was shocked that he did anything. Patrick Eaves had to fight today.

4. Is there any chance that the Wings can actually score a goal against the Blackhawks this time around? The last two games against them didn’t really work out too well.
Hey look at that, the Wings actually scored three goals, plus two in the shootout.

Cookies and Cupcakes for Patrick Eaves
He had a good fight and scored the Wings’ tying goal…even though NBC didn’t see fit to televise it live. Today was yet another solid effort from Eaves, who I’ve liked more and more as the season has worn on.

An Extra Stick Tap for Pavel Datsyuk
I can't say enough about that shootout goal.



Brett Lebda gets the Golden Facepalm
I’m about 90% sure that he should’ve been the one covering Patrick Sharp when he scored the Hawks’ third goal.

What I Learned:
I like the shootout less and less every day. That game deserved a better ending.

Confessions of a Red Wings Fan...

The Wings’ current injury situation has become downright farcical. In light of the epidemic, I can only assume that we, the citizens of Hockeytown, have done some things to offend the Hockey Gods. Somebody out there spent the summer punching babies and it’s about time we got to the bottom of that. We need to take this opportunity to confess our sins so that we can atone for them and return to those days of sunshine and joy when the Hockey Gods smiled fondly down upon us from the rafters of the Joe. I'm coming clean about some things I've done that may have invoked their ire, and I'm joined by some other Wings fans in the hopes that we can appease the Hockey Gods.

Now I know the last couple of games since I started working on this post have been alright and the Wings seem to have escaped injury, but there have still been a couple of close calls (Rafalski and Helm took pucks to the face and Lebda looked like he might've been hurt for a while.) and I'm not willing to take any more chances.

So here goes nothing:

I, Kris, tormented my puppy during the playoffs by doing things like strapping a stuffed Al the Octopus onto her back (Look how defeated she looks here...poor Penny Lane.), putting red and white pompoms in her collar, dressing her up in a Shanny baseball-style jersey, and trying to train her to bark when the Wings scored. I may also at one point taken away all of her toys except her squeaky penguin chew toy so that she would be forced to gnaw on that one during the Finals. There was literally nobody happier to see the playoffs end than my dog.

I also admit to making fun of Valtteri Filppula’s hair. All the time. I’m truly sorry.

Over the summer, I clicked on a shortened link on Twitter and accidentally ended up on a puck bunny website. I sincerely apologize for this horrendous mistake and promise that it will never happen again.

At Hockeyfest, we sat on the bench and jumped over the boards like we were doing a line change. I’m pretty sure that this upset the natural order of things and was simply unacceptable. The fact that my sister can’t even skate and was pretending to take a shift at the Joe had to be deeply upsetting to the Hockey Gods. I’m so sorry for encouraging this type of behavior.

@RedWingsQueen19 chimed in with this confession:

I confess that I had so much hate towards Todd Bertuzzi and wished he was never aquired. I regret it, he proved me wrong so far

@jennbikegirl admitted to wishing injury on Brett Lebda:

My confession: when I heard about Raffy's back, my 1st thought was, why not Lebda? Basically wishing injury on him = bad!

Michael Petrella from The Production Line, however, had the most significant confessions to make. I think after reading his first story, all of the “intent to blow” nonsense will make sense:

I played hockey for a long time: I started skating as soon as I could stand up, and played competitive hockey all the way through college. I like to think of myself as a good sportsman, albeit one with a filthy mouth that never stopped running. Two stories stand out as examples of things I may have done to anger the Hockey Gods -- perhaps bad enough to create this rash of injuries to the team I love so dearly.

During a game I was playing in high school, I ended up on my butt, right along the goal line as a goal was scored against my team. It was so obviously a goal, and I figured everyone knew, that I reached in with my hand and angrily threw the puck back toward center ice in anticipation of another faceoff. But, it was must have been LaRue officiating because the ref skated over, waving emphatically "NO GOAL! NO GOAL! NO GOAL!" In my head, I'm thinking "really?" because I threw the puck only after I figured it was so apparent that everyone in the building saw it. Evidently, only I had seen it, and I didn't say a word. What I did amounts to no less than cheating, and I'm sure the Gods have had it in for me ever since. (P.S. the goal wouldn't have mattered as we lost by a good margin anyway...)

While in college, I was much more of a role-player, in the Kirk Maltby-mold, so I didn't get a ton of ice-time at that level, but cherished the few minutes I received every night. During the last weekend of the season (of my Junior year), we were playing in Wisconsin. We played back-to-back games on Friday and Saturday nights, as is pretty common in collegiate hockey. On Friday night, a senior who had played his heart out for our team for four years was injured by a fairly dirty hit. The kid got two minutes, but with a pretty severe knee injury, my teammate was going to miss his final game of collegiate hockey. I'll never forget his face - he was so upset because he never missed a team function, and now he was going to have to watch the last game of his college career from the press box. The following night, I spent every second of my ice-time aimed at retribution. I was offside more in that game than the rest of my collegiate career combined, because I didn't pay attention to the puck, only #21 in black. At one point, I even broke a stick on the back of his knee. As the final horn went, I took another three or four steps and tried my best to put him through the glass. He was about eight inches taller than me, so I ended up on the ice. I'll never forget what happened next because, even though these two stories aren't indicative of the kind of player I was or man I am, it taught me an important lesson. He took off his glove, and extending his hand to me, helping me back up. He said to me, "I know what you were trying to do, and I would have done the same. You played me hard, good game." Even though my teammate was the one on crutches, I couldn't have felt any worse.

I played hockey at some level for nearly twenty years, and it's fair to say that these two examples are the only ones I'm not proud of. And I'm just superstitious enough to think that the Hockey Gods noticed...

So there you have it, Hockey Gods. We’re all very sorry for the many things that we have done to offend you. We take full responsibility for our actions and hope that you can forgive us. Now can we please get back to our regularly scheduled programming of dominating performances and an elite roster? And, if it’s not too much trouble, could you throw some puck luck our way? We sure could use it.

Sincerely,
Hockeytown

Wings 3, Ducks 2 (OT): Post Game Snipes...

• I felt like the game was going to be a good one because during the pre-game show, Mickey York made an Elin Nordegren joke and then Ozzie almost nailed Ken Daniels with the puck while he was standing on the bench doing an intro. It didn’t let me down.
• Rafalski took a puck to the face during the first period and scared me half to death as he laid on the ice. He returned after receiving some stitches and ended up making a great play to knock a sure goal off of a Duck’s stick.
• I still don’t have any idea what happened during that scrum in front of the Wings’ net with two minutes left in the first. I thought the puck was in the net, but then the replay showed that it wasn’t. But it looked like the referee had signaled for a goal. Then they went to Toronto to review it and that should’ve made me feel better, but I didn’t get my hopes up because I’ve been burned in the past. they ended up getting the call right and the Wings got a powerplay out of the whole mess. This was a little weird because we had all assumed that Jimmy Howard was the one getting called for the penalty. Since the call was against Anaheim, whether or not the puck was in the net probably wasn’t relevant, but I’m okay with whatever was going on since they came to the right conclusion about the goal.
• The Wings’ PK hasn’t allowed a goal in the last 8 games. That’s incredible considering how dismal it was to start the season.
• The powerplay managed two goals tonight. This was especially exciting because I had almost forgotten that you could score on those things. They had 11 opportunities, though, so anything less would’ve been pretty pathetic.
• Brett Lebda got shaken up during the second period. It looked like something with his shoulder. While he was wandering around on the ice, Anaheim scored their first goal. The fact that the Wings sustained an injury and gave up a goal on the same shift pretty much sums up this season. He returned to the ice shortly after, so I don’t know what his problem was. I can tell you, though, that I’ve never been that relieved to see Lebda on the ice in my life.
• It is surprisingly frustrating to watch the game without a clock. Especially when there’s a powerplay.
• Howard made a couple of good saves on a scrum in the first. It felt like it took absolutely forever for the whistle to blow. I would’ve been pretty angry if the puck had gone in with all of those intent to blow calls and quick whistles that have gone against the Wings this season. One of the quotes of the night came from @mserven in response: “Holy mother of LaRue, what does a RW goalie need to do to get a whistle?” You can bet that “Holy mother of LaRue” will be popping up here at SSDD in the future.
• The Wings second goal looked an awful lot like the Ducks’ second goal. Maybe karma finally decided to turn in their favor.
• More fun came during the post-game interview when Trevor Thompson compared Todd Bertuzzi to a pre-teen. While sitting right next to him. It was a pretty gutsy move as far as I can tell. Bert, to his credit, didn’t kill him.
• Mickey York opened his game recap with this quote about Rafalski’s puck to the face: “The Wings needed another injury like they needed a hole in the head. And four minutes in, they got both.” I really can’t think of any way to follow that, so I’m just going to move onto the next section.
  

GP Answers:
1. Ville Leino makes his glorious and injury-mandated return to the lineup tonight. How will he respond to his benching and Babcock’s less-than-kind comments about him? Please let this little stint in the press box be more effective than the last one since it made absolutely no difference in his play.
He looked a little better tonight and picked up an assist on the Wings’ first goal. I still want him to do more, though.

2. I really feel like I should not have to go into every game wondering if the Wings are actually going to be able to put a puck in the net. But that’s what it has come to. I don’t know who’s starting for Anaheim, but they’re going to make the red light behind him turn on at least once tonight, right? Please.
There was a while there when I was wondering if the Wings were heading toward another two-game goalless streak, but they came through in the third period and overtime to win the game. Good lord, did that feel good.

3. Looking at the Wings’ lineup tonight makes me want to hide under the bed in the fetal position. I just…have trouble accepting that as their second line. Maybe this makes me arrogant, but is this for real? I think we’re all, as Jessie from Bingo Bango said, waiting find out that this season has been one big joke right from training camp. The Wings have been playing their games in undisclosed locations and those guys we’ve been watching lollygag around the ice are just impostors. Like in that movie Dave, except the real ones are healthy and not in a coma. And they’re just waiting to surprise us as a giant Christmas present.
Yes. That lineup was, in fact, real. And it even managed to eke out an overtime win. I don’t even know what to make of this season.

4. Every time the Wings play Anaheim, I have to ask myself the same question: What will the Ducks do tonight to make me hate them even more?
The Ducks answered this one during the second period on the play that began with Corey Perry elbowing Ville Leino in the face. Getzlaf chimed in with a hit on Abdelkader, who then ended up fighting with Perry. I use the term fighting generously because the only clip they really played showed Perry sitting on top of Abdelkader and wailing away. It was pretty classic Duck goonery. I did like Abdelkader’s spunk when he was flat on his back on the ice and still swinging at Perry.

Cookies and Cupcakes for Todd Bertuzzi
He scored two goals tonight, including the overtime winner. If that doesn’t earn you free dessert, I don’t know what does. His second goal came off of an absolutely ridiculous shot. Please, please let this carry over and get him on a roll.

Jimmy Howard gets the Golden Facepalm
He played pretty well again, but that second goal has to be stopped.

Pavel Datsyuk gets an Extra Facepalm (?—please help me come up with something better to call this.)
He had the game on his stick, wide open in front of the net during the final minute of regulation. If Bertuzzi hadn’t come along to save the day (No, I can’t believe I just typed that either.), Pav would’ve taken a lot of the blame.

What I learned:
No matter how many hours of hockey I watch and obsess over, there are still moments that can completely baffle me. And I kind of like that.

Wings 0, Thrashers 2: Post Game Snipes...

• I’m so glad that I only paid $15 to see this game. The Wings looked terrible, the crowd was pathetically quiet for most of the night, and the highlight of my night was watching Ozzie and Draper goof around in the net during warmups.
• Although, I have to admit that getting to go out on the ice as part of the turkey bowling thing was pretty cool…even though I looked like an idiot. If you were one of the people who I’m sure was laughing at me, I just want you to know that I had a strategy. It just failed miserably. But our team still won and I’ve got a pair of free tickets to Monday’s game, so the joke’s on you. Also, I had the pleasure of walking around the Joe while my brother carried a frozen turkey for the next two hours. Amazing photographs obviously ensued.
• We went down right behind the Wings’ net to watch warmups and I’m reasonably certain that Justin Abdelkader was trying to kill me. He personally fired at least half a dozen shots that hit the glass directly in front of my face. My little sister was not amused by the whole firing squad effect. If you’ve never watched warmups from that spot before, you’re missing out. It will give you a whole new appreciation for the work that goalies do.
• The News’ recap of the game began with this paragraph:

  It might be time to call in a priest to bless the sticks, or maybe a witch doctor to remove the curse. Because no matter how hard the Red Wings grind, no matter how many shots and chances they create, the puck will not go into the net for them.

  I’ve got a better idea. The team could just bother showing up to play hockey games from time to time. There's a pretty reasonable chance that that would help.
  
• Todd Bertuzzi is officially a waste of ice time. And bench space. And cap space (although that’s less of an issue at this particular moment).
• Also from the News’ recap was this beauty:

  In the third, Bertuzzi broke up a play and went into the Thrashers' zone on a 2-on-1. Yet, he tripped before he could make a play. There was nobody near him, he simply lost an edge -- can you say snakebit?

  I’m not sure ‘snakebit’ is the right word (or the correct grammar for that matter). “Snakebitten” is something you say about a guy who’s having rough couple of weeks on the scoresheet. When you’re having a rough five years, well, then you have to consider the possibility that you just suck.
• Datsyuk tried that thing he does where he flips the puck over the back of the net. One of these times it’s going to work and I think my brain is going to explode from the sheer awesomeness of it.
• Brett Lebda and Brad Stuart should probably never share ice time again. I don’t know what their deal was, but whenever I noticed them paired together bad things were happening.
• My pictures are up on photobucket.
  

GP Answers:
1. The defense wasn’t the only thing Babs was mixing up. The forward lines got put through the scrambler too. Unfortunately, nothing seemed to help.
2. Howard was fine. He gave them a chance to win and they didn’t take it. To think that going into this season my biggest worry was the goaltending. I’m not saying it’s been stellar, but the guys between the pipes are certainly not the reason the Wings have been losing.
3. Still no answer for this one. Someone needs the team’s ability to score goals on a milk carton or something.
4. Same old, same old on the powerplay. I guess the answer’s ‘yes’ for this one.
5. Please refer to the second passage that I’ve quoted from the News above. Yes, that really did happen. And yes, it did look every bit as pathetic in person as it did on TV.

Cookies and Cupcakes for Jimmy Howard
Because nobody else deserves any.

Todd Bertuzzi gets the Golden Facepalm
Once again, please refer to the passage from the News quoted above. This one is a no-brainer.

What I learned:
That carrying a turkey around Joe Louis Arena can actually be ridiculously fun. Especially if your little brother holds it on his head to mock the people wearing the turkey hats (yeah, people actually bought those).

PS. Happy Thanksgiving, one and all!

Wings vs. Thrashers GP...

Wings vs. Thrashers @7:30

1. Well Babcock’s announced his slightly wacky and yet oddly logical plan for the defensive rotation. Somehow, through rotation, line-juggling, and possibly the use of a Time Turner from Harry Potter, he’s going to make the six-man defensive lineup resemble an eight-man lineup. I kind of get it, and I’m all about anything that prevents a third pairing of Lebda and Meech from taking the ice, so I’m willing to give it a shot. Will anyone (on the ice or otherwise) have any clue what’s going on by the end of the game?
2. Babs is also going with Jimmy Howard in net tonight, which worries me much less than I would’ve imagined it would a couple of months ago. Can he keep up his strong play?
3. I asked the same thing last game; it still hasn’t been answered, so I’ll go with it again: Where have all the goals gone? After going on a tear of 19 goals in 3 games, the offense has absolutely dried up. I know the offense has been depleted, but except for the loss of Kronwall, the lineup that’s been on the ice for the last few games is not markedly different from the one that was lighting it up.
4. Part of the offensive stall has been due to the issues with the powerplay. The first unit has been generating some buzz, but if they can’t score, that leaves a second unit of Cleary, Bertuzzi, and Leino. Now, I like Cleary a lot, but there’s a reason we call him Charlie Buckets. He’s the kind of guy who has an uncanny ability to take advantage of the strengths of his linemates. On this unit, there just isn’t a whole lot for him to work with. At this point, I would rather see the third line get powerplay time over this bunch. Are we really going to have to suffer through a one-unit powerplay interminably? And I'm not even willing to discuss the PK...
5. Over the summer I made it very clear that I was unhappy with Bertuzzi’s signing. However, I resolved to give him a chance. I would say that a quarter of the season counts as a fair chance. So far he has done absolutely nothing to impress me. So what fine work does he have in store for us tonight?

Wings vs. Predators GP...

Wings vs. Predators @7 PM

1. The big question is the defense. While this one game obviously won’t be indicative of the next 4-8 weeks, it’ll be a preview into life with a defensive pairing that consists of Brett Lebda and Derek Meech. How many near heart attacks will those two tag team to give fans?
2. Ericsson finally got some powerplay time on Saturday. I think it’s safe to say that I liked him a lot better there than on the penalty kill. Reason dictates, however, that he’ll be seeing a lot of time on both special teams units in the coming weeks. How will he step up into his expanded role after a fairly shaky start?
3. Also regarding Ericsson, he’s slated to be paired with Stuart. How much will having a better partner improve his performance?
UPDATE (11/23/09 1:35 PM): It turns out Ericsson will actually be paired with Lidstrom. This is even better. It's no accident that his best games came when he was forced to fill in for Rafalski during the playoffs last season.
4. Where have all the goals gone? After netting 19 in 3 games, the Wings have only managed 4 (even if we count Brad May’s, 5 isn’t much better) over the last 3 games.

The Preds have come a long way from the days of their obnoxiously annoying tradition of squeaky air quotes fangs (They don’t do that anymore, right? I haven’t heard it in a while.) that inspired my siblings and me to take a picture in front of their building mocking them. They currently sit one point behind the Wings, so this would be kind a nice win to pick up.